What do you define self love to be ? When you go on social media, do you see any forms of self-love in women? Self-love is defined as regard for one’s own well-being and happiness. When I am on social media, I see women who are appreciating their self time which is a form of self love because they are taking the time out to reflect on themselves. Reflection is important because one can see how they have changed, which could be a good thing. Change brings about growth which brings happiness. You are now in tune with your inner-self and you have a positive mindset. Picture yourself taking a day off to just relax. You are reading a book and you have on your face masks. How did that make you feel? Were you calm and relaxed? If yes, you have just done a form of self-care. This self-care ties into self-love because you are taking time to love yourself with no distractions. You are able to take a breath and just relax. 

     In the documentary “Pay it No Mind: The Life and Times of Marsha P. Johnson”, Marsha P. Johnson’s form of self-love was her being a drag queen. She dressed up in her fancy outfits who made her unique while making thousands of people laugh at the shows. It made her happy to see her put a smile on others faces. She has also made progress in this world by herself because her showing her true self made others show their true selves as well. It’s like she made them fall in love with themselves over again. Marsha P.Johnson had a positive outlook on life and that happened because of the self- love she had for herself. Yes, people would be cruel and call her names for that matter but what did she do? She continued to be amazing. To accept self- love, you have to let go of what people think of you whether it’s good or bad, don’t compare yourself to others, trust in yourself when it comes to decision making, etc. Once you do these things, you’re on the right journey to self-love. If someone tells you something about you that hurts your feelings, turn it into a positive statement. If you find yourself comparing yourself to other people, think about how wonderful you are. If you have a hard time making a decision, just trust that the decision you make is one that will be a positive outlook for you. 

    There was one day I decided to have a self-care day. I put my phone down and watched the show I was binge watching at the time. The whole day I went without texting my friends or going on social media. The night came and I did my skincare routine and I felt so relaxed. For me, that was my form of self-love because I tuned out  all distractions to focus on me. I was happy I did so because I got to reflect on myself and while I was reflecting, I noticed that I am someone that always wanted things to be done how I want them to but I came to the conclusion that it’s not possible. I have to wait my turn for when things happen in my life and not rush it. I say this because there was in time I would see all these relationships on social media and I wanted it to be me so badly. I wanted that to be me the same time it was for everyone else. I had to sit back and think “their timing right now,  doesn’t mean it’s yours”. I had to focus on loving myself more because how can I want a relationship with love without loving myself first ? Self-love always starts within yourself is what I’ve learned from this experience. My mom also told me to pray for things that I want to happen and she taught me that God will make it happen when my time is ready for it. This for me was progress and a change I saw happening for myself.

    I hope from this you take that self-love is important for us women because it allows us to bring in the new us. We have to want to do this for ourselves so we can stay connected and not feel like the world is caving in on us.

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